October 19, 2016

Notice

31 Days of Practicing Faith

In October, I am free writing for five minutes a day—raw and unedited—on practicing faith in the every day. Each day is based on a different prompt from 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes.

{Day 19} -Notice

I don’t notice little details. My husband laughs when I say I am the least observant person because he knows it’s probably true. I will often drive the same road over and over without noticing the name of the street or which store I turn at to get to a certain place. If I am not driving, I don’t notice anything around me. I just stare off at the passing scenery or more likely have my nose in a book.

I am horrible with names, forgetting them easily. If you ask me to describe a person I met, I am hard pressed to describe their hair color or height.

It’s not that I don’t care but that my mind can’t seem to be still. If I am riding in a car, I am probably thinking about the place I need to go next or the item on my to-do list I have to get to after this. If I am talking to you, I am probably thinking of my response or how I want to phrase that next statement because my mind thinks faster than my words can keep up with. If I am working, I am doing the task at hand while I think about the kids, the groceries, the laundry, and a million other things. I know better than to try to write in my own home because some distraction will take hold of me and I will stop writing to chase down some other task that seems more urgent.

Maybe it isn’t that I don’t notice little details but that I notice too much. I try to take it all in at once and I just don’t have the ability to see it all. I need to slow down and focus on the thing in front of me, really see it. The person in front of me can so easily get lost in the jumble of my thoughts and I miss their needs, what they are really trying to communicate. I can miss out on worshipping altogether when my mind jumps around instead of being still in the Presence of God. Lord, teach me to stop. To notice. To be fully present wherever I am.

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